Hello, my name is…

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DEFEAT.

It was one of those days, everyone was crabby, frustrated, sad, mad and tired.  Days like that make me want to hop back in bed and just start over.  Its true what they say about having a baby, you will forget the labor and delivery, the long sleepless nights, the hard days…you forget right up until you are head to head with the same challenges and then its like “oh yea, this is going to suck for a bit”.  (yes, I realize that I didn’t just give birth, but the pain and struggles, although different are still the same…I make no sense.)

When my voice of reason (Jay) got home, I cried and said “I don’t remember being this tired and it being this hard”, as Emma screamed because she wanted to be put down and wanted to be held at the same time…I don’t know how to even do that, just hoover her above the ground?   He wisely said “We’ve only been home 2.5 weeks, its all going to take time…be patient”   Obviously patience isn’t my forte, but I’m working on it.

Having a new baby is hard, exhausting and frustrating at times, but with my overall exhaustion and thoughts being so negative its hard to see the amazing miracle that continues to on fold right in front of us.  Why oh why do I let myself feel defeated?  “These are the voices, these are the lies, And I have believed them, for the very last time.”

Emma Grace Motley, I am in awe of you!  You have been with us exactly 32 days today and you are so comfortable with all of us, you feel safe enough to get mad when you don’t get your way, you greet your daddy when he gets home everyday with the most beautiful squeal of excitement, you pucker up for a kiss at the most random times, you love to sing and dance with us,  you love, love, love to swing with your sissies, and you just love for your mommom to hold you.  We love you precious girl, we are so thankful that you are a Motley!

Today is a new day friends, after much prayer yesterday I woke up this morning feeling like a new woman!  HELLO MY NAME IS, CHILD OF THE ONE TRUE KING!

 

Ways to pray for us:

  • Emma (bless her) is trying to figure out all of us crazies, pray that she continues to attach to Jay and I and forms a deep bond with McKayla and Amelia.
  • Amelia:  she is struggling with sharing…her stuff, her room, her mom & dad, etc…pray about that!
  • McKayla is frustrated that she has so much homework to do, all she wants is to play with her sisters.  Pray that she can find a balance and is able to use her time wisely.  She truly is the best big sister!
  • Heather:  I’m convinced that I  live with 2 little chipmunks (based on the evidence on the floors) and I am shocked at how long it takes us to get EVERYONE ready and out the door…pray that I can show myself some grace in regards to the cleanliness of our house and our punctuality.
  • Jay is being tugged in 4 different directions by all the girls in his life wanting his attention (its a rough life)…pray that he can find a balance.  Also, this amazing man is doing much more than he needs to in order to help me, I could not do it without him!
  • Jay & Heather: Pray that we wouldn’t be so overcome by exhaustion everyday that we forget to take time for each other.

If you’ve never heard Matthew West’s song Hello my name is, its worth a listen, here are the lyrics.

Hello, my name is regret
I’m pretty sure we have met
Every single day of your life
I’m the whisper inside
That won’t let you forget

Hello, my name is defeat
I know you recognize me
Just when you think you can win
I’ll drag you right back down again
‘Til you’ve lost all belief

These are the voices, these are the lies
And I have believed them, for the very last time

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I’ve been saved, I’ve been changed, and I have been set free
“Amazing Grace” is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King

I am no longer defined
By all the wreckage behind
The one who makes all things new
Has proven it’s true
Just take a look at my life

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I’ve been saved, I’ve been changed, and I have been set free
“Amazing Grace” is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King

What love the Father has lavished upon us
That we should be called His children
I am a child of the one true King

What love the Father has lavished upon us
That we should be called His children

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I’ve been saved, I’ve been changed, and I have been set free
“Amazing Grace” is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King

I am a child of the one true King

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This man…I love him!

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They love each other…most of the time!

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Our unplanned visit to see santa, Emma was not a fan and Amelia…I have no words child!

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This picture melts my heart everytime I look at it…they love each other so deeply.

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Our first fire this season…and it wasn’t even cold! Emma was amazed!

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Are they twins? Yep, just 18 months apart!

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This child can eat!

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Happy 1 month, my love!

“I’m leavin’ on a jet plane”

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…(except) I know exactly when I’ll be home again!

This crazy crew will be Texas bound in 14 short hours!  Then its 21.5 LONG hours on 3 different planes until we are home!  So that pained sound you just made as you read that is a sign that we need LOTS and LOTS of prayers, please!  Pray that the girls are all content and able to get some sleep on the flight!  Pray for Jay and I to be patient with our three sweet girls…and each other!

Our time here has been great, but one can only take so much time in a hotel room with two toddlers!  We are ready to be home, in our own space, with rules, boundaries and my bed…oh, my bed!

We land in Houston at 8:18pm on November 15th (Flight UA789)…seeing as how China is 14 hours ahead of Texas, we will be ready for lunch when we get home!  (and by lunch I mean Chuys!)  We would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to hug your neck, so come see us and meet the newest Motley.  And if the airport is too far…meet us back at our house for Chuys (seriously, someone needs to pick up lunch, I mean dinner!)

The rules are the same as with Amelia…you can blow Emma kisses, smile real cheesy, talk in a baby voice…but so help me if you try to pick her up, feed her 0r bathe her, I will have to hurt you.  Baby girl will be looking for love from anyone and everyone…she will come up to you, smile real sweet and then throw her arms open for you to pick her up…resist the urge, I’m serious.  We need to continue to build the bond between us and her, for her to fully attach to us as her Mama and Dada!  She’s doing so great, we just want that to continue!

Also, any extra TLC that you can show McKayla and Amelia would be greatly appreciated!!

Last Step, almost complete

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We had our appointment at the US Consulate this morning…it was quick and painless.  Now we just wait for them to get Emma’s visa in her passport so we can come home!   Just like with Amelia, the moment Emma steps foot on US soil she becomes a US citizen!

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Waiting for our guide to pick us up, before our Consulate Appointment this morning.

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At the Consulate, they have a fabulous new building in Guangzhou…two years ago the consulate felt a little shady!

What a difference a week makes

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I have so much to say, I really do.  So much to tell you about the miracle we have witnessed in our precious baby girl in just 7 days, but my words are failing me and in the moments that sweet Emma is napping or sleeping, I am busy loving on my older two, busy enjoying our blip of time that we are in China, or busy sleeping…sleep deprivation isn’t just for moms of infants, its for any new mommy that hears every noise her new baby makes or gets up 500 times a night to make sure she is still breathing.  So know that all is well and that Emma is doing incredibly well!   Continued prayers for Emma to bond with us and for all of us to remain healthy.  Much love, H

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Isn’t it incredible how much fuller Emma’s little face looks after only 7 days?   (Sorry for the blurriness of the pic on the right, its nearly impossible to get this girl to sit still long enough!)

Promise to update soon

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My apologies for not sending more updates, after our first day in Hefei, I struggled to get on my blog or Facebook…we arrived in Guangzhou last night and we are well connected here so I promise to update soon!  We will spend the next week here getting Emma’s medical done and visa for the US completed.  We are leaving now to go get Emma’s medical done, pray that it goes quickly, smoothly and is painless!

 

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My sweet babies waiting for our flight last night!

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Cuddles with Denise!

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Breakfast on the 29th floor!

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Finally warming up to Daddy!

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More Pictures of our baby

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Baby girl is passed out, so I have a minute to post more pictures.  She is doing SO GREAT!  She seems comfortable with me, she is taking in the girls a little at a time and she likes Jay from across the room at the moment.  I feel like we are in a dream!

Nannies from the orphanage in Fuyang...they clearly love Emma and kept telling us how sweet of a girl she is.

Nannies from the orphanage in Fuyang…they clearly love Emma and kept telling us how sweet of a girl she is.

Emma sandwich...bless this child!

Emma sandwich…bless this child!

She's not sure about this big man!

She’s not sure about this big man!

She is checking us out, she hasn't said anything, she has whimpered a little bit...she's not sure what to think of us Texas crazies!

She is checking us out, she hasn’t said anything, she has whimpered a little bit…she’s not sure what to think of us Texas crazies!

We are a lot to take in!

We are a lot to take in!